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tv   The Daily Show With Jon Stewart  Comedy Central  April 15, 2013 9:00am-9:30am PDT

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>> jon: welcome to "the daily show". my name is jon stewart. we've got a good one for you tonight. our guest tonight, if i may tell, i think you are going to enjoy it. our guest tonight is ken burns documentarina. and by that i mean a person who only eats documentaries. [ laughter ] strict document arian. big news out of washington on the gun control front. >> the first big bipartisan breakwillthrough on gun legisla. >> breakthrough this morning on gun control. >> jon: it's oh, my god -- they finally invented a gun that kills other guns. [ laughter ] and won't fire if you are crazy.
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can't they do that? can't they invent a gun that doesn't fire if you are crazy? [laughter] it was a bipartisan gun control proposal. i'm being about to show you something. these two senators manchin of west virginia, toomey of pennsylvania represent different parties and they are going to stand together on television within striking distance of each other and yet they will not fight. let's hear what they have to say. >> back home where i come from we have common sense, nonsense and now we have gunsense. >> jon: interesting he brings up gunsense, i actually saw that off broadway in the 90s. and it was terrible. [ laughter ] but i'm sorry i cut you off before you got to the good part. >> what our measure will do it
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will expand background checks to purchases of firearms at gun shows and over the internet. >> jon: speak of which, holy (bleep) you can buy guns over the internet? and with no background check? shouldn't gun purchases have at least the same procedural rigors applied to porn site screenings? [laughter] yes. yes. now, mr. we get too caught up in the rare sighting of -- before we get too caught up in the rare sighting of two bipartisan men making sweet, sweet law with each other let's remember one thing. >> today is the start with the healthy debate that must end with the senate and house hopefully passing the commonsense measures and the president signing night law. >> jon: that's right the huge breakthrough announced on the news is a proposal by these two guys that in and of itself falls
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short of any of the systemic measures ening visioned post newtown, arizona, aerrora, colorado, we shoot a lot. you get that. this must get through the house and the senate. we all know when it leaves the house it will have been slightly transformed. yeah, that's it. [ laughter ] you know why the house is going to transform it? because the house (bleep) craziest. [ laughter ] but i'm not sure what happens to it in the senate either. the united nations aka the most fashionable anti-violence show room. >> it regulates the transfer of
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light weapons to combat aircraft and ensure they won't be used to the commit acts of terror or organized crime. >> jon: aka the bond viable prevention treaty. see if you can guess what happened next. >> this past weekend the senate passed an amendment specifically prohibiting the u.s. from signing on to the treaty. >> jon: of course they did. if they don't preserve our rights to sell guns to terrorists, what are they going to fight us with? [laughter] ideas? come on! actually, the reason we cannot support a treaty to stop the terrorist and druglords arm trade -- >> ted crux says it should be
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rejected it's international gun regulation and should not be ratified. >> it's laid within language that could you drive a tank through that threatens second amendment rights of all americans. >> jon: how did this become about second amendment rights. treaty reaffirms the sovereign right of any state to regulate a conventional arms pursuant to its legal or constitutional system. if you can link that to a threat on your gun ownership through some bizarro six degrees of charltton heston game. >> the trade treaty is say treaty that seized our authority to have trade -- trade agreement with our allies in terms of the trading arms. >> jon: a treaty that cedes our authority to the united nations. it's a symbolic thing. it's like signing that giant get
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well card to carol. it didn't cost you anything and you haven't ceded your authority to wish her ill. but you don't sign you look like an (bleep). the united nations passed nine regulations against israel in one day. iran is the resolution a month club. remember when the united nations rejected our iraq war resolution thus from preventing us from what might have turned into a decade long, trlz of dollars, thousands of casualties quagmire. we were like we should invade iraq and the u.n. said no and we were like, okay. [ laughter ] so look the senate rejected it. they rejected that treaty and i'm sure that in no way puts the
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united states senate in terrible, terrible company. >> it was overwhelmingly approved 154-3 with iran, north korea why and syria voting against it. >> jon: there you have it. thank you united states senate, we have literally become one of our own worst enemies. we'll we'll be right back
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[cheers and applause] >> jon: welcome back. from here in the united states, we're having reservations about not selling arms to rogue regimes. after all, what is the worst that could happen? >> the world watches north korea yet again. it's believed they are preparing for the test launch of a missile after weeks of threats towards their neighbors. >> the missile's range sup to 2400 -- up to 2400 miles so it could reach as far as guam. >> jon: not guam that's where this country's chewing guam comes from. [ laughter ] i might be thinking of a different place. [ laughter ] bubbalicious land. [ laughter ] north korea gentleman a fairly small, sparsely populated, not oil having country. many students of international
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relations may ask themselves why do they get away with this (bleep). >> china north korea's closest ally. >> the chinese have used their veto in the scowns toll protect north korea china has sworn to protect them against unprovoked aggression. >> jon: china! north korea has a big shot friend in the neighborhood. it's like that movie my body guard. north korea is the bratty dude giving the finger to the world but the hand some and masculine world can't do anything about it because of north korea's enormous pal who, besides being a physical special men holds $1.2 trillion in our debt. there's one problem. >> the tough talk by the chinese government is any indication they are getting pretty much fed up. >> they are willing to start putting pressure on north korea. >> jon: oh, boy matt dillon is going to kick north korea's ass
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now. apparently there's bad blood brewing but the crazy thing for us is how we here at the show found out about it. you may have seen last week we may have had a little gentle fun of north korea of among other things threatening to bomb austin, texas. little miss un-shine. he's got legs. that went boniers in china. 3 million hits in the chinese web site. if you look at the subtitle this man lacks enzymes for lactose digestion. [ laughter ] hash tag for real! more to the point. three million people and mainly in the most coveted demographic
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there, peasants 18-34. seriously man, three million chinese people that's like 80% of their country. sorry on one street, really, wow n a city i've never heard of. oh, i've been doing this show in the wrong country. let's reboot. april 10th, in the year of the snake the dale dwail imperialist puppets. welcome to the show. i am capitalist jon stewart. how about this air quality, am i right? beijing, shank high, it's terrible. i've been confucius quotes that were clearer. let me introduce the band leader comrade zhi peng. what is up brother. who was your weekend zhi? [speaking chinese]
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[laughter] ♪ >> jon: ha. fantastic. by the way have you seen this new north korean leader kim jong-un. he is so short he is not allowed to ride own his own ferris wheel. soas short he called peter the huge guy from game of thrones. what do you call 100 taiwanese in a bathtub? chinese because taiwan doesn't exist independently. boom! i didn't know that could do that. north korea, come on north korea, you have to feel bad for the masses over. there you know what north north koreans call the fortunes in fortune cookies? delicious filling. [laughter] that's our show. join us tomorrow night our guest the dolly -- dolly parton.
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here it is your moment -- ♪ ["daily show" theme song [ birds chirping ]
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[ inhales, exhales ] [ announcer ] cigarettes are not just dangerous when they're smoked. [ rat squeaking ] they're dangerous long after. cigarette butts are toxic. they release chemicals that poison our water... and harm wildlife. and millions... are polluting our environment. [ sniffing ] [ seagulls squawking ] [cheers and applause] >> jon: welcome back. my guest tonight documentary
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filmmaker. his latest film is called "the central park five." >> the lawyer said we're going to lose this case. we plan to get you a plea deal. >> i remember telling them, you know, you guys can cop out, but if i did something, i would cop out. i would want the least amount of time for what i did. if i didn't do anything you can give me the rest of my life in prison. i didn't know what that meant back then but i knew there would be no way i would cop out to something i didn't do. >> jon: please welcome back to the program ken burns. [cheers and applause] so, this is the story of famous central park jogger. five young men in the park that
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night convicted of this really horrible crime. and they spent a tremendous amount of time in jail. and it turns out they had absolutely nothing to do with it. >> nothing to do with it and a judge vacated their convictions and the real rapist came forward and confessed and his dna matched the dna sample that was at the incredibly bloody crime scene and none of five boys hadn't had anything to do with it but they spent upwards of 13 years in jail. the judge vacated convictions in 2002 and they nishitied a civil suit against the city of new york as we would all do and it's ten years and nothing has happened. you can see the -- in 1989 being a member of the central park
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five was among the worst human beings on earth. >> no question. >> you can see the heroism, the essential goodness. it's like a lie detector test. you look in their eyes and i defy you to look and say -- you can go in saying they are guilty. >> they don't even need us to go in the district attorney said they didn't do it. here say singular piece of dna evidence. it's this other guy, who by the way, since they didn't catch him for that even though they had him went on to commit other horrific crimes. >> they could have had him two days before and somebody forgot to follow up. he raped several women and murdered a pregnant women. i think all of this say way of saying we all make mistakes in life. the journalist says it really depends on what you do with it. everybody has med a mistake. these guys are invested in this mistake and it's 24 years. >> it's the part i am having
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trouble getting through. i do believe that these institutions are not malevolent institutions they do try to do their best but this is say case of mass delusion and stub born in a way that is sock. >> it's shameful. we need to put a period on this injustice. it's not just the five. it's the prosecutors and police that lived with this for so long. >> if you are new york city what is their comment about this? do they say, oh, yeah, no, it wasn't them but we're not going to give them money because we -- >> they try out -- they have alternative narratives dujour. they finished off what this guy started or they started what he finished off. or we've information that you don't know. >> you will follow the directive that they were guilty and they have to go to jail don't you
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have to follow the court's directive that they are not guilty and they were wrongly held? if you want to bring charges against them that they were -- >> they haven't done that. >> they will not deal with the case? it's a pipeline snmpleg they are saying it's a no settlement case. they've drawn it out. normally cases get -- >> people trip in new york city that get a million dollars, break their nose on a sidewalk. >> exactly. this is ten years. they subpoenaed all of the outtakes and records. >> jon: our outtakes did they think there was like a blooper reel like, actually we did it. action. don't use that. don't use that. >> they were fishing for inconsistence siz. john you said you entered at 9:01. you told ken and arrest sarah and dave. >> jon: the inconsistencies
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are stunning. none of guys had the same story. they were trying to follow it but it was convolume lawsuited for them. >> you are 14 years old you are 40 hours of interrogation without food and water your parents are in and out and the guys are saying we know you didn't do it. he is saying he did it and it was a circular firing squad. >> jon: new york was an utter mess back then and this case was -- the media was on this thing like fire on gaso line. >> that's the wilding. the kids weren't wilding the media was wilding. this was what it was. it was not unreasonable that the cops thought these kids might have done it once they don't know anything about it they can't describe what happened or where it happened. they only know because it did happen. suddenly they say what about that guy you didn't pick up. they went to say it was a slam
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dunk. >> jon: i don't understand how the city can't say look how far we've come. we've corrected some of the systemic and class oriented and race-oriented discriminatory policies. we changed it. tried to do our best. let's make good with these gis to show the distance we've come. >> jon stewart for mayor! this is it. >> jon: no, no, no. [cheers and applause] here is why: let me just say this, i don't have time to take pictures of my junk and send it to everybody. i don't have to time for that campaigning. >> mayor bloomberg could say remind me again why we're spending hundreds of thousands defending people who made a mistake. say look, can i end this. it releases everybody. all of us who bought the story. didn't you wring your hands? >> jon: yeah. it's a reconciliation with what
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happened. >> nobody has to go to jail. it could just be we made a mistake. how can we make you whole. get on with your life. they are in the 40s and late 30s and they were 14, 15, 16 years old. it's outrageous. >> jon: it's on pbs april 15 at 9:00 p.m. if they win the lawsuit cbs will
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